Flatline
by LJ Summers
Summary: Twilight AU. Bella is changed...and then she disappears.Did she survive? Was she found by the Volturi and slain? Even Alice cannot find her and Edward is left to linger, unable to move on in his mind and heart. His existence is flatlined. An E/B AU.
1. It burns!

**A/N: If you read my drabble "Edward in Maine" in my_ Twilight Moments_ collection, then you have a bit of a peek at a future chapter of this story… But be patient. :)**

**The story will be a short multi-chapter fic, and you may thank _kaghanyou_, award-winning banner artist, whose _Flatline_ banner inspired me to write more.**

**This will be entirely in Edward's POV except for a brief note at the beginning or end of each chapter, which will be in the third person. You'll figure it out.**

******_This is a work of derivative fiction. All things TWILIGHT are the intellectual property of Stephenie Meyer and/or her assignees. I write merely to entertain myself and others and receive no compensation._**

**Thank you for reading! **

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Flatline

[*]to be in a state of no progress or advancement

[*]to come to an end

- Merriam-Webster online dictionary.

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The mirror showed what it always did: A reflection of a static face and form, aesthetically pleasing, but pale and lifeless to his eyes. Once, he had been alive – close to being alive, anyway. As close to it as anyone like him could aspire.

She had brought him to life. Made him see the world with new, light-catching facets. Held up his horrific parts and showed him beauty and magic and delight. She had had a heartbeat...she had changed him.

Then, she had changed. He had changed her.

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_**May, 2006, Phoenix, Arizona**_

_You could let the change happen,_ Carlisle remarked clinically as he stitched the multiple wounds in my Bella's head. _We – I – could send more venom into her, get her out of here. We'd drive her home and you'd be with her all the while._

"What are my options?" I hissed, unwilling to allow her life to be forfeit for mine. The fire of James' far-too-easy death was burning behind us, my emotions were on overload, and my grief at Bella's near loss crippled my entire being. "I can't let this happen."

"Edward! It burns!" Bella cried out. Gasping. Her body was starting to convulse, by all that was holy. "Edward!"

Carlisle flickered a glance to me. I didn't see him do it with my eyes, only with my mind. My eyes were riveted on Bella. On the venomed crescent on her palm. On the vibrations of her body. On the torture in her voice.

_You could try to suck the venom out_, my father said, suturing the final wound in her head before he moved to her leg. _But I can't. I have to stabilize her. It's your choice._

Alice's voice reached my mind. _I've seen her, Edward. She'll be beautiful._

"She _is_ beautiful," I growled, picking up Bella's arm. "I _will_ keep you safe, Bella, I swear it." I could suck the venom out. I could. Rattlesnake toxins, other venom could be removed this way. I could do it.

I could. I promised her.

"Bella, my love. I will love you forever. I swear to you. Each and every day of forever."

Her eyelids slivered open, pinning me with her frightened gaze. "Edward...please..."

Inhaling deeply, keeping her face in my vision, I reopened the wound James had given her. Released her blood...

_Oh... _ I nearly passed out from the excess of unadulterated pleasure. The luxurious _flavor_. The fire-quenching, rich beauty – the _taste_ of her...! Every pleasure known to human and vampire in liquid crimson. My mind exploded as my body wished to do. It was an emotional high, a sexual high, almost a _release_, damn it.

Bella moaned feebly. I opened my eyes. Her convulsions had ceased, her cries for me had stopped. What was I doing! I was supposed to be saving her, not killing her!

"Bella!" I dropped her arm and decided. "Carlisle! Do it. Now. Do it. _I can't lose her!_"

Was it wrong to have licked the last drops of her blood from the corner of my lips? Wrong to savor the gift she had given me? Wrong to keep tasting her...?

Wrong to want her with me forever? Forever seventeen, like me?

My father didn't hesitate. With the speed of our kind, Carlisle ripped Bella's shoes from her feet and bit her ankles, following with bites at her other pulse points. I bit into her jugular. Me, myself. Testing my resolve for this, knowing that she was changing even as I did so. I could taste the barest essence of venom in her blood, which slightly altered its undeniable appeal for me. I could stop. I _would_ stop.

I pumped my venom into her system. Mine. _Mine_. Bella was _mine_.

She was mine...and she was burning.

Carlisle and I checked, laving our venom over her new wounds, over her old wounds, over any scratch and scrape on her precious, pale body. Had I drained her too much? Was she going to be able to make this change or had I killed her?

"Bella!" I gasped, gathering her broken body against my own. "Please, love, don't leave me." Sobbing. Without tears, I was still doubled over with her in my arms, my dead heart yearning to beat for hers. "Please, Bella... Please... I love you."

Her heart – my key indicator into her thoughts, her feelings, her soul – started to pound. Fiercely, as if in answer to my desperate need of her.

_I have to get her leg straight, or it'll heal all wrong, Edward. Careful. Let me just brace it, son. Hold her. Hold her..._

He knew why the reminder was necessary. Because it was just then that the real burning began.

Bella screamed, her voice rising over the violent roar of the fire behind us, over the shouted and mental questions of my family as they wondered what was happening to our Bella.

_Sorry, man_, Jasper called to me. _Is she going to be all right?_

_Edward, bro_, Emmett's mental voice rang with regret but also his typical curiosity and a brotherly protectiveness. _Will she make it?_

"Edward! It burns! Edward, help me!"

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**Updating next week...stay tuned! :)**


	2. Too Late

**A/N: Thanks for the reading! I am so glad that you're here. Love hearing from you. :-)**

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The appearance of life is deceptive. It can be mimicked, and often is. In his mind, all is dead save for the dull, dying spark of hope that had her name encapsulated within it.

He combed the wind from his hair and turned from the mirror. His keys were in his pocket, a familiar dead weight.

Like the rest of him.

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"We have to get her home!" Alice's voice rang through my skull, reverberating with a perfected echo. "Damn it! It's too late!"

I jerked on the floor before tucking Bella – broken bones and all – into my arms and rising smoothly to my feet. She shrieked and I shuddered. "What do you mean?" I growled at my sister. "It can't be too late. You said she'd be beautiful."

Alice's eyes scanned the vicinity with clear rapidity. I could see her inner eye doing likewise. "I don't know. She's going fuzzy, Edward. Oh, this isn't good. Jasper!"

As her mate, Jasper was my sister's rock. Her anchor. Her strength. I envied the pair of them that mutual bond, that instinctive reliance. The completion. I envied them all – until I met Bella and accepted that she was my mate. A human, but strong in the ways that truly mattered. She would be strong enough for this.

She had to be.

In a flurry, Emmett and Jasper worked out a viable plan for transporting Bella. We could charter a flight, but the wait for that would have to be done near enough to Sky Harbor International Airport and that meant possible exposure. We opted to drive. Emmett and Jasper in front; Carlisle, Alice and I sitting in the back, with Bella lying on top of us, her body shaking and burning.

The screams were what terrified me. Not only at the threat they posed – driving off with a screaming female in Scottsdale, Arizona was a monumentally dangerous plan – but at what it meant for my love. My other half. She was burning in the worst of the hellfire. And she wouldn't even have known why!

"Help me! Edward!"

I bent over her, overwhelmed, pressing my cheek to her febrile forehead as we sped north. Carlisle and Alice assisted, pressing their wind-cooled skin against her heated limbs – my sire doing so while becoming a vampiric cast for Bella's shattered ankle – to do what they could to make her feel better. As we neared Sedona, not far from Phoenix at all, and surely not as far as we wanted, we discovered we needed fuel.

But Bella, my darling girl, was still screaming. Her voice was hoarse and the sounds not as piercing, but they still tore at me mercilessly. I could imagine the pain she was undergoing, I remembered the terror.

"Talk to her," Alice whispered. "Remind her. Don't just go all emo, Edward. She needs to remember."

"Bella," I murmured over her dear face. "Bella, it's Edward. I'm here. I'm here. You're – you're changing. Remember we spoke of it at the meadow...? You – you liked the way the sun hit my skin. You're the only one I've known who could accept this all so easily, my love. You – you'll be like me. Soon. Shh, shh," I added, trying to soothe her.

A brief conference between Emmett and Jasper ended as we pulled off into the desert. There were roads here, but they were rough. Jasper growled about his car, but Alice just looked at him a certain way and Jasper was silenced.

"Fine. It's just a car. I know."

"I'll buy you a new one," I rasped.

"It's not that she's not worth it," Jasper said, and the memory of him saying just that to Bella in the hotel while I was so far from her crossed his mind. I winced internally. Her face...so human in its tiny imperfections. Her eyes, such a beguiling mahogany. Her lips...uneven and full and desirable in every possible way. And her scent – Jasper's memory had that on permanent recall as well.

I envied him that.

He caught the strong pulsation of emotion and darted a glance to me. _What? What is it? What's got you all jealous? The hotel?_

I shook my head. "You spent those last days with her as a human...I was so far from her and now..."

My brother's hand encircled my shoulder briefly in support. I could feel reassurance sliding over me as I walked over the sandy soil with great caution. "She's worth it. She is. Look at her, Edward. Already, she's gaining control over herself."

It was true. As Carlisle and Alice ran ahead to find us a suitable hiding place to wait for Emmett to return with a fully-fueled vehicle, I held my Bella carefully in my arms. Her leg had apparently healed already, her hair was already appearing thicker. She was no longer crying out, but clenching her fists. "It's too fast. Her heart can't take this." I swallowed hard, terrified.

"Peace, my brother. We're all here. She'll be fine."

Alice's thoughts reached me with a clear image of a redly-shadowed alcove, away from the sun that was turning all of us into walking pillars of light.

* * *

She burned for forty insanely short hours, ten minutes and fifteen seconds. Exactly. She burned in the Sonoran desert. Miles and miles away from any of the small, dusty desert outposts found north of Phoenix and south of Flagstaff. She burned. Her progress was rapid enough that we – I – couldn't bear to move her again. I opted to sit with her, holding her hand, surrounded by my family. We had no cellular phone service at this location, however; there were no nearby towers. Sedona has been a haven for many free-thinkers over the years, and many of them refused to disrupt the landscape with intrusive structures. The sun set and rose and set again. I was at first frightened, but then amazed and dumbfounded by the quick changes I could see in her body. I wondered about her mind – would I hear it? Would I finally be privileged to see within the mysterious confines of her delightful thoughts?

And then, all at once, her heart accelerated, seeming to draw her body up from the supporting, cool sand upon which her body had gone from human to vampire. From a living, beautiful breathing work of art to perfection of face and figure that would boggle the mind. The human mind. And there were humans still to be considered.

Carlisle had left once he was sure her body had healed; there was a cover story to maintain. Bella had left Forks, apparently because she and I were too intense and she didn't wish to be "tied down" to the small town. My sire had sped away back to Forks, leaving the car with the rest of us. Emmett was needed with Bella – his strength was unsurpassed but even a newborn might overpower him.

We all had to be there.

She had been silent for so many hours that the sudden scream that erupted from her pierced me, as if it would carve a hole through my marble body. She leapt almost twenty feet into the air. Leapt and landed before running, dressed in the brief cotton sundress Alice had procured for her in the nearest town of Sedona. Her bare feet ate the ground, propelling her beyond our reach before any of us could react.

"Bella!"

It was dark as we ran. That mattered not to our eyes as we began, but as the sun rose behind us, we had to take cover – or all of us would be ended with Volterran finality.

And, though we tracked her on foot and by car for more than ten hours, my mate's newborn speed and the blood in her body kept her running.

"Bella!"

I never saw her thoughts. Alice could no longer catch her decisions in the future and Jasper was never close enough to touch on her feelings, even if he had been able to do so now that she had become one of us.

We tried, but we lost her in California. Emmett returned, at length, to Carlisle.

"Bella was seen with Alice and Jasper, Edward," my father reminded me softly as I hid in a hotel under a bright Phoenician sun. This had been her home; her mother's house was under surveillance as well, and we hoped she would remember and return to it.

And though I waited with my siblings for two weeks, we never saw her.

Famished, we returned to Washington.

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_**A/N: Remember to read my Twilight Moments "Edward in Maine" if you're freaking out. It's been up for a while...**_


	3. I waited

**A/N: Hello! Thanks so much for joining me in this AU. I so appreciate the reviews and enjoy interacting with y'all. **

**Remember, as I stated before, this story is entirely in EPOV, except for the third-person insertions that come at the beginning or end of the chapters.**

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I smelled him as soon as I got inside the front door. "Charlie..." I shut my eyes in remorse. I had promised him to take good care of his daughter, only to have her the victim of a tracker. It was my fault that she had had to run from the Chief. My fault! I had heard his voice, trying in vain to persuade Bella to stay home. Making promises we all knew he'd try to keep. Try and fail, likely – he was only human – but he'd try.

Collapsing against the wall next to the door, I pressed my hands vainly to my eyes, wishing I could banish some memories. The fear that had been all my Bella had known – my last hours with her had been rife with it – was what she would have taken with her into this life.

Was it any wonder she felt the need to run? She was my mate, but I had only just acknowledged that. How could she, as a human, have felt that bond? How could I expect it to carry over with her?

I couldn't. "No wonder she ran."

I felt a slight stirring in the air about me before the barest hint of a peaceful calm touched my awareness. "Come on, Edward," Jasper rasped, his voice nearly broken with strain. "Give me a rest, would you?"

"Sorry, Jazz." Rueful, I opened my eyes to see his slanted smile. The family's thoughts were quiet – oddly so, as if they'd try to give me surcease in whatever manner they could. Images of Bella screaming and running, of my family's worries for her, of their worries for any humans she had since encountered.

_Poor Edward. I loved her, too. _ Esme made the first move to physically try to comfort me, wrapping her arms around my chest. I embraced her, too, and the rest of the family converged upon us, a silent chorus of care and worried love reaching me. _Edward?  
_

"Yes," I said, as the family withdrew and we moved lethargically into the living room. Our steps were reluctant, but we settled into our usual chairs and seats as – well, as humans did.

"Charlie came by," Esme went on aloud from her perch on Carlisle's lap. "He was looking for you."

I cringed inwardly to see the meeting play out in Esme's purpose-called memory.

. . .

"_What the hell was that all about? Where's Edward?" Charlie Swan had demanded of Esme. He looked as if he hadn't slept in days. _

"_Charlie, come in. You look exhausted. Let me get you something."_

_The Chief grimaced and shook his head once. "No, thank you. I want to talk to your son. Bella promised to call and she never did and I need to find out what they hell they were fighting about."_

_Esme balked. "Edward – Edward said he was going to follow her!"_

_Charlie Swan stared, apparently incredulous. "Alone?" _

_Doing a good job of feigning a blush for a woman who had no blood in her body, Esme glanced down at her hands. "No. Carlisle went with him. What – what did she say?" _

"_That she was going back to her mother." He passed a hand down his face. "But I called and Reneé – Bella's mom – isn't even _in_ Phoenix. She's in _Florida_. And my little girl is down there. Alone."_

. . .

"I went to see him," Carlisle added after a moment. "I told him you and Bella had run off with Jasper and Alice."

"What?" I jumped to my feet in disbelief. I saw that confrontation play out in Carlisle's mind. Charlie's red-faced fury, the tears in his eyes, the frustration that played out on his highly mobile features as Carlisle pretended his own brand of shock and confusion.

Carlisle gently moved out from under Esme on the large leather club chair. _Edward, _he said silently as I listened to his thoughts._ I had no idea when you'd find her._

I choked on a sudden rush of feeling that constricted my chest. _When. When? _

As if he were the mind-reader, Carlisle took me by the shoulders. _I didn't know what to do besides having you all die in a car fire, son._ With a lift of his brow, he added, "Did you really want me to tell Charlie Swan that his daughter had been killed in that ballet studio fire?"

"No." The response was echoed by each member of the family. Even Rosalie.

"That would have put us under suspicion. I don't want to have to leave so soon, Carlisle. Look," she went on, moving to stand in front of the cold hearth and face us as if she were presenting a solution to all of life's problems. "We all know that having a human know about us is disastrous. And now she's not human. She clearly didn't feel like she was a part of us, or she wouldn't have left."

"She was my mate!" I snapped. "I know I only just figured it out recently, but she is."

"She doesn't know that, does she? She's gone, Edward." My sister's voice softened but she didn't approach me. Which was good, because my finger were itching to rip her hair out of her head. "We can ask around, of course, to try to find her but she's gone. And we need to act normally, right now, to keep suspicion down."

I couldn't act normally. After a moment, I nodded and left to plod slowly up the stairs to my room. My mind wouldn't leave the image of her, lying on the desert sand. My body remembered what it felt like to hold her human form. The warmth of her skin, the luster of her eyes as she was growing drowsy on that night. Our kiss in the meadow, how her body had felt pressed into mine. My throat burned, but the torture was only one part of my suffering. I had grown so instantly, painfully aroused and didn't dare let her know. It would have been inappropriate at such an early stage in our relationship. I felt myself stir, in painful recollection, imagining what she would feel like now. Her beauty had been so heart-catching as a human and it had only been refined by the venom I had forced upon her system. Her skin would not be warm, but it would be strong, and I would be able to hold her without fear of breaking her. I could kiss her, taste her –

_Edward!_

The silent, strident cry came from every mind in my family, interrupting my developing fantasy. "What?" I leapt from the black leather couch I had been reclining upon and all but flew from my room. Jasper was braced, shoulders straight and hands free as I paused at the top of the stairs. I saw the news broadcast through Jasper's mind. He had been using headphones so as to spare the rest of us the noise. While my mind was otherwise occupied, apparently, he had told the rest of them what he had seen.

His voice had none of its southern twang when he spoke. "Blood. They found her blood, leaving the studio. There is suspicion of foul play and she was last seen with us, Edward." Calm rose up like a wall between us as I froze in utter indecision.

The phone rang. Carlisle's darkened eyes met my own black ones. "I have to answer it."

"I know."

"Well crap! That girl just can't _disappear_, can she?"

"Rosalie Hale Cullen!"

I leapt to the ground floor, my despair and fury battling for dominance as I tried to reach Rosalie. Emmett caught me, though. _Sorry, bro. Can't let ya hurt my mate._

Jasper yanked Rose aside and I stilled in Emmett's powerful grip. "Just keep her away from me."

We could hear Carlisle on the phone. Charlie Swan was on his way back. Jasper, Alice and I had to disappear.

While Charlie came to our house, I used the downpour as a cover to make my way through the woods to his. Slipping through Bella's window, I almost collapsed under the inundation of her scent. It was everywhere. I had to have some of it. I needed it. Desperately. It was instinctive. Swallowing back the venom that made its despicable presence known in my mouth, I ripped the pillowcases from Bella's two thin pillows and tucked them under my jacket. I did a quick check of her room, but we had been together for a matter of days – no matter that her impact in my life would be eternal – and there were no mementos of the two of us. Nothing outside of my perfect recall.

Regret pierced me. So much time lost in a useless effort to keep her safe.

We had to leave Forks behind us forever. My heart, too – I made a memorial to Isabella Marie Swan just inside the forest that ringed our home. I carved a rock to look like my heart. Her name on one side of it, mine on the other. Planted it amidst some freesia transplanted from Esme's garden.

I wept tearlessly, curled up like an infant in the back seat of my Volvo, breathing in her scent. We had had such a short time together, but I would never, ever forget my Bella.

"Oh, Bella," I rasped every night. I had her clothes. I kept her scent near me as long as I could. It was all I had.

* * *

Hunting was only needed to provide energy. He needed no energy. He didn't want to thrive – couldn't, not without her. His thoughts were divided as always. Part of his awareness was devoted to the family. They had been careful to keep all recriminations from their thoughts. Part of his mind dedicated itself to just keeping the façade.

But most of the time, he lived on a stagnant plane, reliving the only significant part of his long existence. Over and over again.


	4. But there was nothing

**A/N: Yes, this is early! Be amazed!**

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**Chapter Four: "But there was nothing."**

Colors were flat. Dull. He used to know vibrancy. He used to be able to hear the beauty in the subtle sounds of nature. Now, out in the world, he saw everything in shades of gray and beige. Discussing it with anyone was pointless.

The existence of a rock beckoned. He was a stone, too.

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"Tanya, we can't stay with you openly. We're wanted fugitives." In Alaska, we met with our cousins, the original Succubi who were considered the Denali Coven, much as we were the Olympic Coven. Though Tanya and her sisters had taken the last name of Alexander – from Alexandrova, after Irina's bloodline, remembered from the bare stitches of her memory – they were often called the Denalis by those in our world.

Tanya eyed me tenderly, with no trace of her prior sexual interest in her expression. "This is about that girl?" she inquired in Russian. "The one you were running from?"

"Da." I didn't need to say anything further. She didn't inquire. Instead, she waved an arm expansively and addressed herself to my sire. "Carlisle. We are family. What is ours, is yours. We have the cabin, you know, a mile from here." Her thoughts took her to the memory of the last time she had used it, with a human male named Scott who had been an athlete in and out of bed, apparently. He had left her with a smile from that same small "hunting cabin." "You may use that as long as it is needed." With a graceful motion, she flipped her hair over her shoulder. "You said that the charges are unfounded, yes?"

Carlisle, humanity's ways and habits ingrained in him like his own musculature, crossed his legs and settled more deeply into the cushions of the sofa in Tanya's living room. Warm colors and accents reminiscent of Eastern Europe made this a tasteful abode. "Unfounded, in that we of course didn't run off with her. But that was her blood they found, yes. She ran from us."

"She must have been frightened!" Kate interjected. "I was, I remember. So do you think she'll turn up...?"

The casual tone of Kate's voice brought me to the brink of snapping. Unable to stay seated, I bounced to my feet and strode out of the room and then out the front door. I only then noticed the fading light. Winter still held sway this far to the north. I breathed in the cold, clean air. Its edges seemed to knick at my lungs, but I welcomed the slight discomfort.

_Edward! Don't leave us! You can't! _

"Alice..." Part of me seemed to writhe with the need to blame her – blame someone! – for what had happened to Bella. But I knew it wasn't Alice's fault. If the blame fell to anyone, it was to me, for pulling her into my world. "I shouldn't have come back in the first place," I whispered to my sister.

She stood in front of me, her small form vibrating with the need to do something. _Your eyes are too dark. We're going hunting. You'll think better, then._

It became a pattern for us for the following year. We hid. Esme, Emmett and Rosalie were free to come and go in the larger, human world. _Their_ faces weren't on posters in the small post offices and stores all over the U.S. and Canada. _Their_ faces weren't on any Most Wanted lists to be found online. With the help of Jenks, we all had new identification, but only three members of our family could make use of theirs.

Charlie Swan was still Chief of Police in Forks, Washington and he was not letting the disappearance of his seventeen-year-old daughter be forgotten.

The days dragged by, as if in slow-motion. We hunted. We stayed hidden in the wilderness, returning to the cabin sporadically, as the mood struck us. I hated being around my family. Emmett with his overwhelming wish to make everything work right spent days at his computer, monitoring news services.

"She's a newborn," he had reminded me months past. "As much as I hate to remind you, she's going to be thirsty. And she's going to find food. And we should be able to track her down that way."

The image of my beloved Bella lunging and attacking defenseless humans – possibly still terrified to find herself needing to do so, undoubtedly hating me for bringing this to her – gave me such pain as to bring me to my knees.

_I know, man. I know. But – it's the only way we've got to find her._

A tour group was lost in the Big Sur and we thought we had her. But the bodies were found eventually and exsanguination hadn't been the cause of death. It had been a clear rock-slide. No suspicious wounds...

Where was she? It was almost as if she was hiding from the humans as well as her mind hid from my gift.

I hid myself for a time, in a snowbank. It had been two years since we had seen Bella...

Alice burrowed in after me. I could hear her thoughts. I avoided her most of all; her guilt paralyzed me and left Jasper looking utterly defeated. Only when she left his side was he able to relax and I heard, on the rarer times when I was with them, what a horrid relief he felt in having his wife hunt with someone else. Anyone else. Just for a few hours.

_Edward...I hate myself. If I hadn't told you –_

"Shhhh," I said to her as she slid in to my snowy hole in the ground. It was dark, but it didn't matter to us. We sat with our knees pulled up to our chins, back to back. I could see her thoughts, she could sense any decisions I made...

But neither of us knew anything.

My sister spoke out loud, her voice wavering. "Maybe she didn't make it."

It was our private terror. My own personal Hell. "She has to be out there. There is no world without Bella Swan." No world for me.

"Jasper was thinking she might have run into Maria...somewhere...and that's how she's kept hidden and out of sight."

Memories of what my brother had endured at the hands of Maria made me groan in the snow. "Oh... No, not Bella. No..."

It was all my fault.

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It was another day before Alice and I dug our way out of the snow. Fear had chilled us in a way that all of nature's fury could not. We walked the miles back to the cabin, our steps nearly soundless. Her mind was filled with Jasper's tales of terror and mine could not help but imagine Bella immersed in Maria's culture. What havoc was that woman wreaking now that the Southern Wars were over?

Esme all but pushed me into my bathroom to shower. I did so in a desultory manner. Over the years, I had occasionally allowed my mind to wander, to think of a possible reunion with Bella. To consider what it might be like, to be with her. Over the decades, I had learned more than I ever wanted to know about making love and I let myself, well, fantasize about Bella and me. My imagination was truly the only escape I had. When I was wrapped in my dreams, I could shut out the rest of the thoughts of my family for a short time. I pretended I was with Bella...

But no fantasies were there to comfort me this day. The nightmares I was entertaining did not even leave room for the barest hint of sensual experience. I could find no release.

Dressed in black – there was no color to be had in my heart – I reluctantly heeded the wishes of my family and joined them for a time. We sat in front of the fire. A movie played on the large HD television, but only Rosalie made any pretense of watching.

When Carlisle's cell phone rang, we all started, jerking to a mutual awareness as if we were all guilty of some crime. I saw in Carlisle's mind that the incoming call originated in Italy.

"Hello?"

"Carlisle. So good to hear your voice, my friend. I shan't waste time with trivialities, because I really just had one question for you."

We were all on our feet, the entire family gathered around Carlisle's chair. His gaze flickered over each of us. Fearful thoughts, questions, suspicions flew from mind to mind, almost like a silent thought-cacophony for me.

After a brief pause, Carlisle's eyes rested on mine again. "Aro, hello. It is good to hear from you. How may I be of service?" _ I have to be polite, son. _

"Only by answering a simple question, dear fellow. Have you been adding to your family without telling us? Hmmm?"

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**A/N: Yes, I ended this chapter **_**there**_**. Commence with the throwing of rotten fruit. Just please – no avocados! **

**A note regarding posting: I have been compelled to go back to work part-time. This is a good thing, but it leaves me with rather less time to write than I had. I will continue to post once a week on this story, but I beg your indulgence if I'm not always "regular" in this regard. **_**Flatline**_** will be about eleven chapters long as I have it currently outlined. Thank you so much for reading. **


	5. Hope Torn Away

**A/N: Thank you all for your kind words and good wishes. :) And your patience! My thanks to Tor and EKSmith for their twitter-reference-desk awesomeness.**

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* * *

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Maintaining a façade meant less than nothing to him. His own existence was endless. There was no motivation to be anything other than a rock.

A monster of a man. Someone not even worth having any sort of respectable outer layer. He moved, but the minutiae that he had once marveled at was meaningless.

Solomon had said it best in Ecclesiastes. _Emptiness of emptinesses_. A rough Hebrew translation that summed up all of his life since he had changed her.

* * *

"Have you been adding to your family without telling us? Hmmm?"

Carlisle's brows went high into his forehead. His thoughts were exceedingly rapid while my dead heart crumbled in my chest. _He's found Bella? And she remembers? What has she been doing to call down the Volturi? She must be in Italy. Edward will be – Oh, my son. I'm sorry._ Aloud, his eyes on mine, he said, "Our family has the same seven in it that we've had since 1950, old friend."

"Ah. Then have any of your...progeny...changed anyone...without your knowledge or consent?"

"No!" I shouted from the midst of my renewed pain. "No!"

"Edward!"

Alice and Jasper flanked me immediately, holding me up physically while Jasper endeavored to ease my suffering. "Carlisle. You know that a quick trip will answer all my questions for me, but – it would be the act of a friend to spare me the necessary journey." The Volterran lord's voice was light, but edged with venom.

"How?" I whispered, dreading the answer. Every muscle in my body fought against my instinctive need to run and keep on running until my existence ended. "Does he have her?"

"Ah, that is the mind-reader, is it not? Carlisle, you really ought to bring your fascinating family to visit someday. Yes, Edward – it is Edward, right? – I have dossiers on you all."

"Aro. As you know, Edward's mate – a human – was changed by us two years ago."

"His mate?" Surprise in Aro's voice fed me both hope and horror. "She never mentioned him."

"You've seen her?" I asked, my jaw clenched against a scream. Alice's hands dug into my arms, helping me to center my Jasper-smoothed emotions.

"Isabella Marie Swan, I believe is her name, yes? No, I haven't. But my Tracking team has. Cardamom is a unique fragrance for a vampire to have, you see. Carlisle's sire had it, and it is Carlisle's scent as well. You are aware, of course, that all your creations carry your scent?"

"I know. But I –"

"Of course, yours was not the only scent. Lemon and honey and lilacs and freesia. Quite a complicated mess you made of this one, Carlisle. Was she changed by committee?" His voice lilted through humor, but he was not pleased.

Carlisle darted a look to Esme._ He's angry. _

"Ah, excuse me. I've just been informed. Do watch the news, Carlisle. See if you can take care of this rogue of yours. If we find her again, she'll be brought to me and inducted into the Guard."

"No!" I shouted again, this time in angry protest. "No! Not Bella! No!"

"Enough!" Aro's thin patience had snapped and we all heard it.

_Shut the hell up, Edward, or I swear to you I'll rip your head from your shoulders. I will not have my Alice anywhere near that creep_.

Jasper's warning was enough of a check. I silenced myself. There was more at stake here than just my missing mate. Aro would love to get his hands on Carlisle again.

Emmett had CNN on the flatscreen before Carlisle could make a polite goodbye.

"Yes, Eric, it seems the mystery has come to an end," the on-camera reporter was saying. The CNN logo and news-band was rolling on the bottom of the screen, while above it, a woman in her mid-thirties was standing in front of a large Viking statue near the shore of Lake Winnipeg in Manitoba, Canada. "Here, in the home of one of the largest Icelandic populations outside of Iceland, we have found a missing American girl who was believed to be murdered in Phoenix, Arizona back in 2006." The image of the reporter slid away to reveal a clearly amateur video.

"Bella..." my family said in one breath. Indeed, it was clearly my Bella in the cloudy light of a Manitoban spring. The video seemed to be taken of the statue of the viking in the background, but in it I could clearly see Bella with two other vampires. One, a tall and imposing fellow who looked big enough to take on Emmett. The other was smaller, but stood with a fierce attitude. He glared for a moment right at the amateur videographer.

"Felix and Demetri. I know them," Carlisle murmured. His mind flashed over various encounters from his time staying with the Volturi. "This must be the Tracking team Aro spoke of."

The reporter went on. "Isabella Swan was reported missing and then presumed dead in Phoenix. Her father, Police Chief Charles Swan of Forks, Washington, has worked tirelessly to find the alleged killers of his daughter." There was a silent clip of Charlie holding a press conference. "Persons of interest included the family of a young man with whom she had recently broken up. Accounts say that she left her father to return to her mother in Phoenix but was attacked and killed in the Arizona capital. Now that she has been seen to be alive, and is in her majority at the age of nineteen years, we can only conclude that she – like so many others – simply ran away from home."

The visual shifted to a bedraggled, red-eyed Chief Swan. "Bella. Bells. Honey. Just call me, would you? I'm so thankful you're alive, but I'd love to hear from you. Please."

The anchor nodded at the camera as the view switched to him. "Thank you, Astrid. If not the happiest ending to that mystery, it is good to know that one young woman is still alive and, apparently, in good health."

Emmett clicked the television to _mute_ and we all turned to exchange glances. My family's thoughts were almost audible, so loudly did their expressions telegraph them.

_What is she doing with the Guard?_

_Oh, her eyes...did you see them? I couldn't see them._

_She looks...great, bro._

_Oh...it's so good to see her all right but... Bella! The Guard?_

_Damn, Edward? I know you're up here. I feel you, but shit, brother. Do not mess with the current vibe, okay? Right now is the least tense I've felt in years._

Words lodged in my throat. "I have to find her," I rasped after what felt like a lifetime. "She was in Manitoba. I have to find her."

Esme nodded with rapid enthusiasm. "We'll all come with you, of course."

Alice, her face pinched and expression confused, shook her head slowly. "No...we can't all go. I can't see her future – you know that – but I see you devastated, Edward.

"I am," I snapped.

"I know. But it'll be worse. If we all go."

I consciously decided, focusing on her mind and her current stream of visions, to go looking on my own. I saw myself finding a girl and calling her name, a smile on my face as I crossed to her.

"That's it. Just me. I'll find her!"

* * *

Carlisle and Esme made me promise that I wouldn't be gone for more than three years. I pushed for four.

My sire put a careful hand on my shoulder and held my eyes with his own. _Edward. I was alone so long. I know how desperate you must be feeling. It is likely that she has found a life for herself by now. Even if it's a nomad's life. She might have found – someone else, if she has no memory of you_. The memory of Bella standing in between Felix and Demetri of the Guard flashed through his mind. Call us. Keep in touch with us. Don't just disappear, no matter what. We want her back, too, Edward.

I embarked upon the life of a nomad in 2008, running through Canada. I decided to start my search where we had last seen her on TV: in front of Gimli the Viking on the shore of Lake Winnipeg.

The first time I saw the girl in Alice's vision, my dead heart leapt in incredulous joy. She had been in Quebec in 2010 and I had been searching for almost two years. That I had had to look so long as I saw as my penance; that I saw her last felt like a gift from Heaven.

"Bella!" I called, startling the French-speaking locals. "Bella!" I ran at a human speed to her side, seeing her hair caress her back and experiencing the sudden, intense desire for that hair to surround me, as well. Skin to skin, we could –

"_Pardon moi?_" Her voice was musical, but the perfect French accent threw me. With a lifted brow, she added, "What?"

It wasn't her.

It wasn't her in New York City. Or Columbus, Ohio. Or Brentwood, Tennessee. It wasn't her in Albuquerque, New Mexico or Cando, North Dakota.

I was sitting, ignoring the burn in my throat and the strange lethargy in my limbs on the bank of Devil's Lake, North Dakota when my phone rang.

"It's time, Edward."

I sighed brokenly. "I know, Alice."

Her whisper was tentative through the mobile phone. "You haven't been hunting. You should."

"Why?"

"Edward."

"What?'

"Meet us in Freeport, Maine. Make sure to hunt along the way."

My life stretched out in bleak, gray shades. Endless roads and flat plains. The forested Northeast didn't sound all that appealing. But I had promised.

"I'll be there."


	6. Midnight in Maine

**A/N: My thanks to SiriusMunchkin for her on-the-spot L.L. Bean details! Any deviations from reality are on my head, not hers. I write AU. _Alternate_. You know. :) **

******This is not quite "Edward in Maine"** from the _Twilight Moments_ drabble collection, since the story I have written has altered a few of those details. For example, it's only been six years...chapter six...you know... Going for numeric consistency. :) Thanks so much for reading! I've SO enjoyed hearing from y'all.

* * *

There was no pulse. Not in his body, not in the air around him. There was only the sudden onslaught of meaningless daily trivia. His presence was meaningless. A flatline on a monitor.

It signified nothing.

* * *

I stood within the tree line. Maine was quite inundated with trees, meaning shade for much of the year if one knew how to travel. I did.

The phone vibrated in my pocket as I lingered, delaying my re-entry into the world. So far, for so long, I had been apart from most of humanity, save when I took a chance and dove into a river of people, following the whiff of a familiar fragrance – not quite, but still familiar – or a fall of hair or the way a woman moved. But I did not linger after another piece was chipped from the hunk of granite that was my heart. Disappearing came after.

"Alice."

"Edward." My name was a sigh in her lilting voice. It was early May and Spring was in full force here in Freeport. "You've been hunting. Good. I can see you going in. I see you – but only to a certain point. That's so...odd."

Curiosity sparked more life in me than I had felt in a more time than I cared to recollect. "How do you mean?" I leaned against a tree, hearing the mental voices of approaching vacationers from New Hampshire, who were coming to the L.L. Bean's flagship store to resupply. "Your vision stops?" She was so far from me that I couldn't see her mind.

"It's as if you're photoshopped out. Does that make sense?"

"Photoshopped..." I stopped, flashing through the myriad memories I'd acquired. "Oh, the touch-up program Jasper uses when he's faking pictures for Jenks."

"Yeah. So I don't know, really, what's going to happen in that store, Edward. Maybe you should go someplace else?"

To test her idea, I decided on that instant to go to one of the other nearby stores. "No!" she shrieked. "No! Don't do that. Oh, Edward, please. Just – just go. It doesn't go black. Just...muted. Blended, I think is what Jasper would call it."

"Blended. Huh." I had nothing else to say as I stared over the distance between myself and the big boot that symbolized the franchise to most of North America. "I'll call when I'm done."

"Be careful!"

"I will."

The low clouds parted to allow a shaft of light send near-blinding reflections of light bouncing off chrome and glass. I growled, low in my chest, but waited. Until the phone rang again.

"Edward. Alice is all doing backflips over here and she can't talk without squealing. She said to remind you that the store is open twenty-four/seven so you should come back at about one in the morning, okay?" In the background, I did hear my sister all but incoherent in excitement. My lips stretched into an expression so unfamiliar, I had to touch it.

I was smiling. "Fine," I said. "I'll come back at one in the morning."

Jasper chuckled and I heard his "Oof!" before his, "All right. You go on, now. Call us when you're on your way back."

I left my wooded hang-out and dared to go close enough to catch thoughts... I was seeking information about a hotel. Something. I decided to stay in the trees and do a human-jog circuit of the area as far as I could go. Between my eyes and ears and that blessing/curse of mind-reading, I knew I'd find something suitable. I always did.

* * *

The concierge at the Hampton Inn was curious when I entered the lobby at a few minutes before one in the morning, but when I explained about wanting to go to L.L. Bean, he grinned lopsidedly, revealing uneven creases in his freckled cheeks.

"Ah, yep. Ya won't be th'only one. Nope. Ya have a good time."

I thanked him and walked out the door, heading to the parking lot under a moon that was only one day past its fullness. The clear skies and high color of the moon made my lack of flashlight understandable. Dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt, I blended right in.

Upon reaching the store, I pushed right through the perennially-unlocked doors. A few other midnight adventurers were here as well, but the employees were easily recognized by their khaki trousers and green shirts. I saw in the thoughts of a smiling woman that she was guessing what size "boat and tote" I'd be using to shop, since my hands were empty.

She guessed I'd go for the blue handles. I did, not wanting to seem out of her expectations. After that, I stood and scanned the store. My job was to choose picnic foods for a family outing – foods that would later get donated to a women's shelter in Vermont.

"Can I help you find something," the woman said. Her nametag told me her name was Lin and my nearly-numb expression reflected off her glasses. "It's a big store."

"It is." I told her my cover story and she directed me to the appropriate part of the store.

Then, stepping a bit away from me, her friendly demeanor not at all affected by the odd hour, she added, "The check out line's over there. I'm sure Marie or Dennis will help you when you're ready."

I did as she said, hearing vaguely someone go on break and return and then the air shifted not too far from my location. Lemon and honey. I was ostensibly shopping for food. But the lilac scent mixed with them brought the venom to freeze in my body. Cardamom...

_Freesia_.

I dropped the canvas bag I was carrying and flashed – uncaring of video surveillance systems or any other patrons – to find out where she was going.

Rich, lustrous sable hair, glinting faintly red under the overhead lights, moved as she stepped up behind a register. She smiled and indicated she was available to help the next person.

In another blur of motion, I retrieved my bag and became her next customer.

"Thank you so much," the woman said. "You have a good day."

My breath came fast – an involuntary reaction – as I reached her.

She smiled at me with every smile of every polite retail worker in the world. "Good morning, sir. Will there be anything else? Find everything all right?"

Not the voice I remembered in my head, no. It was a feminine tenor bell, really. Beautiful. I was gasping by this time. Tasting the fragrance on my tongue. There was no bloodlust associated with this taste-aroma now, for the scent was not tainted by the tang of blood.

"N-no," I said, stuttering. I was, in appearance, a young man confronted with a woman of singular beauty. I was in actuality a vampire confronted with the woman he had given up hope of ever seeing.

She took my food purchases. "Would you be interested in the L.L. Bean Visa?" I waited for the recognition to hit her. Waited for her to whisper my name. Waited for some kind of response but there was –

Nothing.

Devastated, I couldn't respond to her business-related queries. I could only manage to ask, "Bella? It is you, isn't it?"

Her eyes widened in shock, and I only then noticed their color. A strange sort of green shade.

Green?

Oh, I could see the edges of a contact lens. Yes... Disguises. We all used them at some point. But why disguise her eyes? Golden eyes were not inhuman. Not dangerous.

Unless her eyes were not golden, but burgundy. She had not been taught! What could I expect?

Without looking at my purchases, she whispered at vampire-speed. "I don't use that name here. I left it behind. Who sent you? Who are you?" Then, with a perfect façade, she asked, "Anything else for you today, sir? Are you on our email list?"

In the undertone meant for her ears only, I snapped, "No one sent me. I'm Edward Cullen. I used to be," I began before drawing in a psychologically-necessary breath, "used to be your _mate_."

I knew how it happened. I knew how vampires recognized their mates. It was an instantaneous response. The first time Carlisle touched Esme after she had come to herself following her change. The first time Emmett and Rosalie clasped hands – I had been there. My breath came in shallow, anxious pants as I held out my credit card to her. Her hand would brush mine...

She shook her head. "Don't touch me."

"I have to see you. When are you finished?"

"How did you know?"

Our conversation was like lightning, made in clear flashes that affected my personal world. But it was lightning in a cloud – not clearly seen by anyone else. "Know your name?"

"Yes."

"Let me see you later."

"Here you go, sir," she said in her public voice. "Thanks for coming by at such an unusual time."

I would not let her dismiss me. Playing the part of a besotted man – for I was, damn it – I leaned closer to her. "Can I get your number?"

"It's in the bag," she said without a smile. "Now get out of the store." The retail smile reappeared. "Have a good day!"

"Count on it," I called over my shoulder. Already, today was better than any day had been for six full years.

I grinned at Lin on my way out the door. _Boy, Marie must have made his night_, she thought.

She had indeed.


	7. Blip

**A/N: I thank you so much for your support of this story! I'm glad you're enjoying it.**

* * *

I waited outside the store until 4:17 in the morning. I could have gone back to the Inn, but I felt as if Bella would disappear if I did, so I waited. Until another phone call disrupted my vigil.

"Ed. Dude. Tell me you're not perched like a creepy stalker."

"I'm not perched like a creepy stalker." I wasn't. I was perched like an agent of the FBI or Secret Service. Sworn to guard my charge.

"You used to watch her in her room, Edward. Why do I have the feeling that not much has changed since then?"

"I was trying to grow accustomed to her."

"And now?"

"I just don't want her to get away," I confessed.

"So you are perched like a stalker!"

"Not exactly," I hedged.

Emmett didn't see it my way. "Have you considered, Edward, that she doesn't want to see you?"

I nodded, said it out loud and kept my eye on the store. "But she gave me her phone number." Of course, the "I want answers: 207-555-6623," wasn't exactly the dream I had been holding, but I was thankful to see her and know it was really her – my Bella! – so it was perfect.

"She's been on her own a long time. She's survived just fine. She's one of us, now. You should give her some space."

"Emmett!"

"Edward. She escaped from the Guard, bro. The freakin' _Guard_. Go jack off in your hotel room and give Bella her space."

I grimaced. "Crude, Emm."

"You've done it before, _Eddie_."

I hated it when he called me _Eddie_. And when he was right. And I was quite irked that he was right while calling me _Eddie_. "Stuff it, Emmett."

"Don't you wish."

I had had about enough of that, so I growled warningly. "Any other oh-so-valuable advice?" I actually respected his opinion as regarded the partnering of females; he had managed to stay happily married to Rosalie Hale for decades and she'd only torn off a body part of his once.

I returned to the Inn and tried not to get my hopes up.

It was too late.

* * *

"Why are your eyes golden?"

It was half past eight on a drizzly morning. Marie, as she insisted upon being called out here in the open in a maple grove near the Hampton Inn, refused to come indoors. We were half a mile from her place of employment, making it easy for her to have traced me by scent just as I was ready to call her.

"What color are yours?" I countered, trying to keep my tension from my voice. My body was held in utter tension. The yearning to hold her – the desire to confirm the mate bond I believed in when she had been human – fought with the absolute need to respect her wishes. And Bella – Marie – had made it abundantly clear that she did not want to touch me.

She even wore gloves to this meeting. In the mild, fifty-one degree weather, they were only barely unusual. After staring at me for a moment, she took her gloves off. "They're more red today, so I'm wearing the contacts." With a flurry of rapid motions, she had the lenses out of her eyes and into a protective white case, which she tucked back into the pocket of her work trousers.

Not the fresh crimson from a recent hunt, but her eyes were still red enough to notice. I tried to keep my face impassive as the misty morning light grew. "Oh. How often," I stopped and swallowed, "how often do you find you need to hunt, here? I know that contacts can be irritating."

She smiled and seemed to relax. "Your eyes are golden without lenses, I see. How do you do that?"

She didn't remember, clearly. "I feed from animals." At her curious expression, I felt encouraged to continue. "My whole family does. We – we try not to –" I didn't want to make her feel I was judging what she did. I wanted her to continue to relax with me. Her mind was silent, so I could only evaluate my conversational performance based upon her body's cues. "We try not to take any more lives. My sire, Carlisle, was the first of us to try living like that."

"Us?"

I paused, feeling as if I were groping my way before I answered. "Might I invite you into the lobby, Be -Marie?"

She eyed the sky and bit her lip and that little gesture sent a surge of hope through me. "How about we go to my apartment?" she suggested. "Then I don't have to replace my contacts."

I grinned. It was better than being rejected outright. "Great."

As we walked at a human pace for the mile or so to her apartment, she told me how she had decided to change her eye color randomly. Blue and green and brown, "so that the humans would be used to a difference."

"Why do you live among them at all?" I wondered. "Most of us are nomads. Wanderers."

"I – I used to wander. I was, was encouraged not to."

Unthinking, I reached for her arm. "The Volturi?" I ventured on a hard whisper. The sleeve of her shirt kept her skin covered which I imagined influenced her decision not to jerk herself away from me. I dropped my hand anyway, not wanting to intrude too far into her "space."

"You said you weren't from them," she hissed at me, turning in a blink, limbs stiff and ready to flee.

"I'm not! I've never met them but their leader, Aro, called my sire, Carlisle, about you."

She inhaled with a surprised sound. "Oh! Carlisle. Felix mentioned him. He's your sire?" She smiled with some incredulity. "Really?"

Trying to keep up with her rapid mood swings, I nodded. "I'm his first-created. His firstborn, he would say."

Without warning, Bella leaned in to me, so closely that I was enveloped in the complicated allurement of her scents. I closed my eyes and, for the brief instant I had, I wallowed in her unique fragrance. My arms ached to enfold her, my body tightened at her proximity, but I held still. I needed to touch her with every cell of myself, but she had not indicated she would allow it.

Her sigh as she moved away was tangible. "Cardamom. Felix said that was from Carlisle." She grinned. "So, we're like brother and sister, in a way."

I laughed and shook my head. You're my mate! I wanted to remind her. I refrained. "Not exactly. But would you like to meet the rest of the family?"

"There are more of you?"

"Indeed. And we live not too far from here."

"Do you all have golden eyes?" At my assertion that we did, she shook her head and looked bewildered. "You go against everything we are?"

My fingers twitched, wishing to take her hands in mine. "We try to be better than we are, Marie."

A neighbor of hers left the adjacent apartment and called out a greeting. Bella smiled and looked down at her hands without looking up at the older woman. Her eyes, of course. "Let's go in," she said at our own vampiric volume.

We did, and I told her the stories of the family – stories she hadn't heard, before, certainly. Now there were no secrets to keep. I wanted to be completely open. So many things I wanted to share with her. But first...

"You know, the rest of the family is eager to see you. They hadn't had much of an opportunity, before, except for Alice and Jasper. It's kind of a long story."

She wanted to hear it, though; that much was clear in her red gaze. Those eyes felt alien to me. Bella, the kind and soft-spoken girl I had known, would be appalled at those eyes, I was fairly certain. "I've got a long day before I have to be back at work..."

"So would you like to meet the rest?"

She stepped close to me, inhaling again, and this time I felt her sway – slightly but she did – toward me. I held my breath, wishing, hoping... "On one condition," she whispered, eyes downcast.

"What?"

"Please – please don't, don't test our skin." She lifted her face to me, her expression newly vulnerable. "Demetri tried that and the bond wasn't there and I – it was uncomfortable for both of us."

Demetri? A jealous knife sliced under my skin, tightening my muscles in defense. Still, I had no right to it – no right to feel so possessive. Not really. I decided not to ask for details. "I would not force myself on you like that," I assured her quietly. "But do not doubt for a moment that I want to. As soon as you allow it."

"All right."

* * *

Sometimes, life announced itself with the cry of a baby. Sometimes, with an notice in the media or official proclamations.

And sometimes, life was demonstrated by the smallest blip on a monitor. Interrupting the flatline that had previously indicated death.


	8. Catching Up

**A/N: Thank you so much for reading and following me along on this short story! I appreciate it! Thanks, too, for the adds to your lists! **

* * *

"Bella!"

I held up a hand to forestall the nearly-inevitable familial onslaught. "_Marie_, may I introduce my family?" She inched closer to me, making me want to slide an arm behind her. I remembered the day I introduced Human Bella to my family. No food issues at the incipient introductions, to be certain.

One by one, the family introduced themselves. It was odd for me to experience this. Bella and I had had a dinner, a day in the meadow and then a brief introduction and game of baseball before her world was splintered and – apparently – obliterated by the venom of three vampires. Yet she had been a part of our collective consciousness for years. A guilty burden we had borne, a missing piece to our family.

My lost mate.

To her, it was evident we were strangers, all of us. But when she met Carlisle, her polite social expression gave way to avid curiosity.

"You're my sire." It was a statement. "And hers, and his and his and hers?"

Carlisle appeared to be a bit taken aback. I couldn't help the smile that twitched at my lips. He nodded. "Yes."

"Why?" She asked the question with no judgment, but a stark flatness to her voice that caused Carlisle's thoughts to huddle protectively.

Out of all of us in the room, Carlisle looked most at home sitting on the hearth, elbows on knees as he conversed. The room had a long sofa, two loveseats and a couple of recliners. Still, Carlisle chose to sit on the hearth. "Why? They were – all of them – on the verge of death, B- Marie."

"You're a doctor, Carlisle. That's what Edward said?" She glanced at me for confirmation, her brows arched in question. I nodded and she continued. "Do you make vampires out of all your patients?"

_Yeah, go ahead, Pop, explain this one. _

_Oh dear, she's going to ask about her own change and – oh, dear._

_Edward? I can't feel her emotions, but I can read her body language and this girl is not happy._

_Edward! Be careful!_

_Yes, Carlisle, why don't you tell her that you didn't give us a choice, hm?_

My family had all sorts of opinions that flew about the room, but my focus was – after Alice's warning – primarily on Bella. Marie. Whomever she was, her scent and body beckoned to me.

"No," Carlisle said after a few moments. "I don't. Just those...I felt drawn to help in that way."

"Did you ask them?"

"They were nearly _dead_, Bella."

"Marie," she asserted softly.

"My apologies. _Marie_." He found my eyes with his, a rueful tilt of his head communicating eloquently. "I didn't, no." He grimaced and looked at his hands. I knew that his thoughts on this score were always tinged with remorse. "But I acted for those that I have changed, in their best interests."

"Me, too?" my mate whispered. "Was I nearly dead?"

"You had been wounded in an attack," my father said with hospital-style detachment. "You suffered from a head wound and broken bones as well as a vampire bite. Venom."

The family stilled to hear Dr. Cullen discuss the injuries. Bella appeared spell-bound. "Your venom?"

"No," I murmured. "The one who wounded you – his name was James."

Bella leapt from the sofa, almost touching the high ceiling before rolling in the air over our heads to land easily behind me. So quickly had she moved that only Jasper had acted quickly enough to stand protectively in front of his mate.

My brother did not take his eyes off Bella. _Shit. What did I tell you?_

_Edward! I warned you. Go easy_. I saw an image of future-me, wearing my current attire, crumpled in despair on the front porch.

Acting on instinct, I didn't approach Bella at all. "Marie? Are you all right?"

Her expression was a vision of red-eyed caution. "James. That's what Victoria said. She said I'd killed her mate...?"

"No, that would have been me," Jasper said, his stance relaxing though he still had an arm in front of Alice.

"And me!" my sister chimed in. "And Emmett. We all killed James."

Bella stood a little hipshot. "Then what was she going on and on about? I don't get it."

Finally, I asked the question that had been pulsing at my mind as well as the minds of each of my family. "What do you remember?" Holding my breath, I wondered if she'd answer or run away. For a moment, I imagined she was debating those very choices.

Her eyes darkened a little and she met my gaze with her own. "I remember my name. My name is Isabella Marie Swan."

"And that's all?" Rosalie asked, her tone sorrowful as she took an involuntary step toward Bella. In her mind, she wanted to offer comfort to the girl who had had so much stolen from her. "Just your name?" _Even I knew a bit more than that, and they were there for me_. Compassion overwhelmed my blond sister for a few moments and she stilled, half a step closer to Bella.

A room of vampires who did not have to pretend to be human still often acted human. So it was that Esme came to sit with Carlisle on the hearthstones, Jasper sat on one of the recliners and pulled Alice into his lap and Emmett cozied up with Rose on one of the loveseats. I took a corner of the long sofa and indicated with a gesture and a hopeful half-smile that Bella could take the other corner. I didn't want her to feel crowded.

She flashed around the sofa and seemed to backwards-burrow into the cushions on the other end of it. "I have the memory of the burning. And it was hot. Hot everywhere and very dry. I was surrounded by – by something that frightened me, loomed over me, and I ran. I felt as if I were being chased and I – I couldn't let whatever it was catch me, you know?"

My heart broke to hear her matter-of-fact recitation of the events of her rebirth. I must have been the one to frighten her. I was closest to her. My voice was the one she would have been hearing. I – I terrified her! I was a monster!

I buried my face in my hands, feeling as if the rest of my heart had been shattered.

My family's thoughts were entirely compassionate, seeming to envelope me even as Jasper's ability was able to work its way through my inner devastation.

"Edward?" Bella's voice reached through the various layers of self-disgust I found myself wallowing in. "What? What is it?"

I couldn't look at her and spoke to my knees. "I was the one who must have frightened you, Bella. I was there with you. You woke up, saw me, screamed and ran. And I – we – chased you for days. It's my fault you – you're one of us. My fault."

_We're going to let you guys have some privacy. Maybe this is what the two of you need. I don't see anything, though. I'm just going on instinct. Careful. And remember we love you!_

For Alice, I made the quicksilver decision to thank her and ask her to pass my gratitude along to the rest of the family. She saw that happening and I let the decision go. After what seemed an age, I looked up to meet Bella's anxious expression. "I'm sorry."

"I was scared, you know."

"I know."

She inched out of her corner, moving to the middle of the sofa and leaning toward me. "You smell like me. I thought at first it was Carlisle in us but you – your venom's in me too? Demetri just thought –"

Jealousy and near violence shot through me again. Perhaps she sensed it, because she shook her head. "Sorry. I only meant that Felix said I smelled like Carlisle a little. And I know I smell a little like you. And you said there was another – James? His venom, too?"

"Yes," I rasped. "I am so sorry. You were broken and bleeding and I couldn't let you – couldn't let you go, Bella. I'm sorry. _Marie_."

Her smile surprised me. It was sweet, apologetic and entirely beautiful. There. _There_ was my Bella. Red-eyed or not, she was still there. "It's okay. It's my name, right?"

"You always used to insist on it in school."

"Oh."

The family was outside; I could hear them trying to be quiet. I inhaled and decided to ask. "What happened? We couldn't find you, and believe me, I looked. I ran criss-cross over most of this continent looking for you. I – I didn't know what else to do." The small sounds outside stilled. I ignored them and focused entirely on Bella. "I am so sorry I frightened you."

She nodded. "It's over. I – I only know this life now, you know? So don't apologize for helping give it to me." She brushed my sleeve with her ungloved hand. "I'm sorry to have worried you so. All of you, I guess, huh?"

"Yeah."

She leaned into the cushion and doodled invisibly on the seat between us. "I felt the burn, you know?" I didn't want to distract her. Everything in me needed to know where she had been. If she had been _safe_ when I hadn't been able to protect her. I nodded and she kept going. "But I had strength, I knew I did, and the most important thing when I woke up was to get safe. I felt so scared. My instincts said I had to protect myself first. So I did. Sorry," she added on a whisper.

"It's over," I reminded her, repeating her earlier admonishment to me. Daring to repeat her gesture, I brushed her sleeved arm as well. Her flesh underneath the fabric tempted me...so much...but I restrained myself. "Then what happened?"

"When I felt safe, I was so thirsty..."

"I remember that feeling."

"You feed from animals, you said?"

"Yes."

"Well...I didn't think of that. I only knew that...humans smelled good." She shrugged. "So I drank."

I nodded. "It is the natural food for our kind."

"I just tried not to get caught, you know? For a couple of years. I only knew to feed and stay hidden. It was instinctive. Was it like that for you, at first?"

"Carlisle encouraged all of us to feed from animals at first. I – I didn't always. Most of us have slipped up."

"Fed from humans."

"Yeah. We try not to. We prefer to retain as much of our humanity as possible. And Carlisle works, as I told you, and we often go to school. So we can stay together and support one another."

"Felix said you were different, the Olympic Coven."

"How'd you meet them?"

"Victoria...she was trying to kill me. Because of James." I winced and she sighed a little before tracing her finger on my arm again. I relished the pressure of her finger and imagined how it would feel when – if – she allowed me to touch her. Skin on skin... "It's over, remember?" We smiled at each other and I leaned forward just an inch in her direction. She didn't seem to mind. "So...she couldn't kill me and I couldn't seem to catch her and stop her, either." My imagination conjured terrifying images of Bella fighting with the Titian-haired nomad. I almost shuddered. "She decided to sic the Volturi on me."

_So that's why there were with her_, Carlisle thought with loud clarity to me. _She was set up. A trap. Aro would not have been pleased..._

"Aro of the Volturi called us," I told her, relating the whole of that conversation and touching again on my long search for her. "What happened to Victoria?" I asked when I had finished.

"She escaped. But so did I," she added with a shift of her body that seemed self-protective. "I don't know what happened to her. Felix said they wanted to take her back to Italy."

I could only hope they had.

After our conversation dwindled, leaving us seated alone in quiet, I felt the need to _move_. To _do_ something. To just _be_ with Bella for a while. Restless, I rose to my feet. "Would you like to - to go for a walk?"

_Aw, aren't you Mr. Old-Fashioned_, Emmett teased.

Rosalie only thought, _Try not to let her get away this time, huh? I'm sick of you being all emo._

Esme waited near the back door, just beyond the small bistro table. "It's a lovely day for a walk," she remarked, glancing at the overcast spring sky before smiling at us. "It's so good to see you again, Bella."

"Thank you. I – I hope that maybe...maybe I'll be able to remember the 'before' part someday."

That hope burned in my reconstituted heart as well.

* * *

Silent steps into the wider world can be taken out of ennui or desperation. These are the steps of the lifeless wanderer. But they can also be taken out of hope and expectation. Thus does the flatline of a dead heart change, showing the stirrings of life.

He shoved his hands in his pockets, grinned at his companion, and indicated with a nod that together, they would prove that life does follow non-life.


	9. No Tears

**With my thanks to Katmom for letting me know I wasn't gross and Melolabel for her excellent notion!**

* * *

The pattern of the brain depends upon response to sensory input. Peaks on a line, peeking in the mind...

Remembering how to respond is part of one's cultural humanity. Memory is often best served by patience.

* * *

She left me at dusk, returning home to shower and change for the "graveyard shift" at L.L. Bean. "You know," I had ventured, "you don't have to work if you don't want to. You – as Carlisle's child, essentially – can make your home with us."

Her look was wide-eyed and apprehensive. "I don't think so... I'm – no. I can't."

It had been too early to put that on the table, clearly. As I was not enrolled with the rest of my siblings at school at present, I was touted as being "homeschooled" and thus my presence went unremarked as I "hiked" with Bella. As spring turned to summer, I filled her in on what I knew of her human life. She spent time with the family and we all came to appreciate her dry humor.

And her fierce talent for self-preservation.

"So? How did you fight her?" Jasper wondered one evening. Bella did have occasional nights off. This one was on a summery evening and we all, as a family, were enjoying the fresh air in Bradbury Mountain State Park, mere minutes away. We were lounging around the bases of branch-linked trees in the dark. Overhead, stars kept time as my military brother picked Bella's brain.

Bella – who was now allowing us to use that name for her – leaned forward over her knees. "She was like a – a tornado, Jasper. Wind through my fingers. You said we met her once, right?" she queried with a quick look to me. At my nod, she continued. "She'd fly over me and kick my back." Bella frowned, her hands moving in miniature jerks as she replayed what the fights had been like for her. "I'd try to grab her leg – sometimes, I'd succeed – and throw her down."

"Yeah, but she didn't stay that way, right?" Jasper inferred, his thoughts filled with his idea of the visuals. I could see Victoria's red hair in his imagination as he added Bella to a recreated bout of hand-to-hand. "She got away."

"A lot. She got away a lot." She shot a rueful grin at Jasper. "You would have managed her better. Maybe you could teach me?"

He chuckled. "I could do that. Been a while since I trained a newborn."

Bella sniffed, but I didn't detect any real animosity from her. She arched one brow. "I am not a newborn!"

Alice held up her hand. "So if she got away, was that when she called the Volturi?"

"No. She –" With an uncomfortable look, Bella whispered, "She set me up."

Carlisle made a beckoning motion. "How?"

Clearly uneasy, Bella tossed a section of hair over her shoulder. Her fragrance – that beautiful, alluring accent to all that she was – drifted over to me, surrounding me. I found myself more relaxed, yet also highly alert. My fingers twitched in my longing to touch her, to comb my hand through all that luxuriant hair...

"She hunted. Fed from so many humans, leaving their – their bodies. Making it look as if a newborn had done it." With an entirely serious expression, she met Alice's look. "I had outgrown my newborn thirst by then, honest. And I never once left ... traces."

"This, I know," Emmett asserted with a nod. "I looked, Bella. We all did."

She nodded; this was information she had assimilated over the weeks we had spent getting reacquainted. "She did, and Felix and Demetri came out. Turns out they knew her and Demetri was able to find her." A smile perked up her features and she looked out as us through some hair that had fallen back over her shoulders. "But he couldn't find me. Even after we met."

* * *

I found myself wallowing in my new memories of Bella. New concepts, new appreciations. She was there when I ran at night. She was there when I tried to tune out the rest of my family as they were intimate.

_She was there. _

I closed my eyes and imagined her with me. The mate bond. I knew from the thoughts of others what it felt like in a once-removed kind of way. Would it feel like that for me? That instant connection? Bella and I had had... something... while she was still human. Something that I had never felt before or since. What would it be like...? The taste of her lips, a new idea of how she would respond to me. Would it be as it was the day in the meadow? Would she kiss me with such passion? Would I miss the heat of her skin or relish its new durability?

As I daydreamed, I wove a fantasy. Two. More. With none of my prior desperation, I allowed myself to find my own solitary expressions of joyful, silent release.

Never was I more thankful that Emmett was not a mindreader.

* * *

"I think you should see this," my sister Rosalie said near the end of June. School was "out" and Bella was spending the day with all of us. "It might help your memory."

"Rose!" I hastened to interrupt.

My sister shot me a flat look. "What? It was on the news, Edward. It's not a secret. Everyone who watched the news right then saw it."

Bella, who had been flipping through one of Rosalie's car magazines, stilled before sliding the magazine to the coffee table. With apparent deliberation, she swallowed and laced her fingers together. A glance showed me that her eyes were very dark. Not quite the brown of my early memories, but an old red. She hadn't hunted in quite some time. We endeavored never to be judgmental when she did, over the weeks, but she seemed to wish to respect our "diet" even so.

"The news? Is this about Victoria?" Poised to leap – a defensive measure we had all seen her utilize since we'd found her again – she stood from the loveseat she and I were sharing. "If she thinks to bring the Trackers back..."

"No," Rose said, crossing to a flat drawer near the stereo. "It's about your father."

With angled brows indexing her confusion, Bella's stance eased and she turned to me. "Carlisle? Is something wrong with our sire?"

Rosalie made an impatient, huffing sound as she slid a DVD into the slot on the DVD player. "No, Bells. Your _dad_. Charlie _Swan_!" Without anything more to say, she maneuvered the remote controls and the CNN logo of four years past appeared on the television.

"_Yes, Eric, it seems the mystery has come to an end. Here, in the home of one of the largest Icelandic populations outside of Iceland, we have found a missing American girl who was believed to be murdered in Phoenix, Arizona back in 2006." _

"Demetri and Felix!" Bella didn't shout, but she clenched her fists and hissed as she watched the rest of the brief news story Rose had recorded from the online video. "Wait, that's me, right? I remember that, of course." She spared me a slanted smile. "You know, I have heard that you look heavier onscreen... Never thought I'd see myself on one, though!"

I had to chuckle even as she refocused on the recorded news presentation. "Did, did Aro see this?"

"He called," I told her quietly.

"Hm."

"_Isabella Swan was reported missing and then presumed dead in Phoenix. Her father, Police Chief Charles Swan of Forks, Washington, has worked tirelessly to find the alleged killers of his daughter. Persons of interest included the family of a young man with whom she had recently broken up. Accounts say that she left her father to return to her mother in Phoenix but was attacked and killed in the Arizona capital. Now that she has been seen to be alive, and is in her majority at the age of nineteen years, we can only conclude that she – like so many others – simply ran away from home."_

"The young man – was that you?" she asked without taking her eyes from the screen. Her father was about to speak and it seemed she had bent almost her entire awareness to hear what he would say.

I made a swift agreement so as not to speak over the recording.

Hearing Charlie Swan's voice again after all these years was a bit unnerving for me. _"Bella. Bells. Honey. Just call me, would you? I'm so thankful you're alive, but I'd love to hear from you. Please."_

Bella shook herself as Rose paused the DVD. "That's my father? My, my dad?"

"Yes," Rosalie said. "And he misses you. He still makes a plea every year for you to call him. Every year, Isabella." Stern of face, Rosalie's heart was softer than it appeared on the surface. _At least my parents knew I had died. They weren't wondering what had happened. I bet Chief Swan never figured on vampiric amnesia. I wish she'd call him. Or maybe – maybe we should just fake her death and move on and let him find some closure_.

"That's not a bad idea," I murmured out loud, knowing my sister would hear me and understand I'd been mildly focused on her idea.

"It'd be something." She started making plans and I heard Alice's thoughts from upstairs as the plans coalesced.

The visions my psychic sister were beginning to have shattered, though, when Bella said something slowly and almost too softly for even me to hear.

"I remember. I remember his voice. I do."

The muscles of her face worked, her breath choked as she expelled it. "I remember...I remember... There was a house and a truck and fish and I remember my mom but not in the same place..." Her dry sobs prompted me to place a careful arm around her, making sure not to touch her skin. I refused to take advantage of her beneficial (to my way of thinking) distress and test the mate bond when she had so clearly asked me not to, once.

Still, it was my Bella, my love, who turned into my chest and – with obvious care – began to pour her grief out. At no time did she touch my skin, but my body was well aware of every inch of hers that pressed against me.

Rosalie had a cocky grin for me when I looked in her direction._ See? I told you it was a good idea._

The rest of the family rejoiced in the memories Bella carried with her from her human life. It seemed I was the only one who noticed they stopped abruptly at the ballet studio.

Still not holding my hand, she nevertheless curled into my side as the family brought forth all the moments in which they had encountered her in school and out of it. She added her own details and we laughed together at her remembrance of first seeing Carlisle and finding him blindingly handsome.

Esme preened, filled with pride in her mate as well as joy in her new daughter. _She has to be one of us now. She remembers! She'll join with us. She has to!_

But she didn't _have_ to – in the midst of my joy in Bella's recovered memories, I couldn't forget that she didn't mention anything of her feelings for me.

Perhaps they had been lost, those feelings.

_Patience, Edward_. Jasper's thoughts reached me clearly. His expression was peaceful, his eyes shining golden from a recent hunt. _She's not as indifferent as she's making it seem. She's nervous, my brother. It's a good thing._

Patience, he had counseled. How much more patient did I have to be?

As it turned out – not too much more.

* * *

**E/N: Information about the FGB Autism Awareness Compilation as well as The Faithful Shipper Awards and The Sunflower Awards is up on my profile. **


	10. Renaissance

**A/N: I promised ten chapters. I promised it to MYSELF, anyway. And so here it is: the final chapter. And it's twice as long as most of the rest of them. ;-)**

* * *

Bella was nervous, Jasper had informed me. I envied him his ability to perceive past the façade she presented. He felt that, I know. That quick pulsation of jealousy. He offered me half a shrug. What else could he do?

We spent the rest of that momentous day together as a family. It was only near the end of it, as a late dusk started shading the sky, that Bella reminded us she had a job.

Rosalie rolled her eyes as Emmett grinned and said, "You know we're all jealous, right?"

"Jealous of working retail?"

"No, of you having a job!" Alice supplied with a smile of her own. "How do you manage to work with humans?"

Bella cocked her head. "How do you manage to go to high school with them, over and over?"

"Good point," Jasper conceded, rising and drawing Alice up against his side. The pair of them moved in synch – they always had. "And now, I sense that you're in the mood to be off, Bella. So I'll abscond with my wife and we'll leave you in peace."

On the walk back to Bella's apartment, I offered her my arm. I always wore long sleeves when I would be with her, now, because I loved the feel of her touch, even through a layer of fabric. With a smile, she took it, her fingers resting at the bend in my elbow as she absently played with the light fabric. I loved that she felt comfortable enough to go that far. Loved that she leaned lightly into me. I sighed.

"Edward," she murmured as we had meandered out of earshot of the house. "I remember us, too."

Yes! I wanted to laugh in delight. I wanted to whisk her into my arms and press enthusiastic kisses up and down her throat, inhaling her myriad fragrances. I wanted to – ridiculous as it might seem – break out singing John Denver's "Annie's Song." I wanted – Well, it didn't matter what I wanted. Not that evening. Instead of acting like a presumptuous buffoon, I restrained myself. "I'm so glad. I've never forgotten. What do you remember?"

"I remember how you saved my life from the van. And I remember the meadow..." She smiled up at me through her lashes, her eyes dark and her skin pale and – for a split second – she looked like Human Bella again. She stopped walking we stood, under darkening light, studying one another. I was hesitant to speak – I didn't want to ruin anything by any renewed declarations. After forty-seven endless seconds, she spoke again. "I – About Demetri."

I swallowed the surge of venom that all but spouted from its glands. "Yes?" I did _not_ growl.

She kept her hands on my forearms. I didn't understand her reticence to touch me, but I had promised her not to try to touch her until she gave me permission, so I kept my word. "I didn't remember you, then. I hadn't spent time with anyone of our kind except Victoria and when they came, they were – very helpful. I guess, I guess we were friends." I nodded, my jaw still tight with worry and, yes, jealousy. "Demetri and Felix always wore gloves. To hide their skin, they said. But we got to be friends and, and Demetri wanted to – to, um." Her eyes fluttered up and down, darting with apparent discomfort. "Wanted for us to have sex."

"Just like that?" I gasped, sounding strangled. "What. The. Hell."

Bella blinked very solemnly and waited until I had mastered myself. "He said that, among our kind, sating our desires was really not a big concern. There were no adverse consequences, like disease. He and Felix –"

"Both of them?" I did growl that time.

All at once, Bella laughed. "No! No, they were just explaining things to me and wondered if I, you know, had had sex before." Then, she tossed her head a little. "You know, Edward, you're cute when you're angry."

No, I didn't want her to leave it there. "Jealous, Bella. Jealous." She seemed taken aback at my confession, but I started walking again and elucidating. "I told you, back in May, that I used to be your mate. You were human, but the signs were there. I didn't want to believe it. Couldn't. I couldn't imagine you having to become – become like me. Not for anything."

"But Edward," she said, catching up instantly and walking by my side. "How did you know? I mean, we touched..."

Almost, I abandoned my promise to grab her bare hand. Almost. "We did. You – made a profound impact on me, Isabella Swan. Never doubt that." I had to know. "Did Demetri...do likewise? On you? You said he wanted to test...?"

She threw her hands in front of her face and stalked ahead of me. In spite of my tension, I had to smile.

"He did, yes. He said he was _drawn_ to me. That I _affected_ him," she called softly over her shoulder. "So he kissed me, okay? And so did Felix." She kept walking, walking away from me as I stood, stilled in silent fury. Had they hurt her?

I fought past that reaction to ask her. She finally stopped and turned and shook her head. "No. But it was...awkward. And so when you said what you did to me in the store, it made me –"

I could only imagine. No memories of us. Of the van. Of the meadow... Nothing and here comes this strange vampire declaring mate-hood. My embarrassment was almost fully consuming, but it loosened my muscles and I flashed to join her. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

She smiled, then the smile grew into a broad grin which led to her laughter – a most wonderful, uplifting sound.

I think I would have enfolded her in my arms in the next moment. I ached to have her there, to feel the pressure of her body next to mine. I didn't give a damn if we were in the woods or on a street corner. I just wanted to _feel_ her.

But we were in the woods. And it was dark. Out of the darkness, a red-haired fiend came all but flying.

"I knew I'd find you, you bitch!"

It was _almost_ as Jasper had visualized it – Bella and her shielded mind set about their self-preservation. I leapt in, too, trying to use my superior speed to catch and trap Victoria. Bella tried, after her initial leap into the trees, to attack her nemesis. Brown hair met red, white fingers stretched, high voices roared with wordless violence.

And then the cavalry arrived, with Major Jasper Whitlock riding on point.

After emitting a high-pitched shriek, Victoria leapt up at a forty-two degree angle, rebounding off a heavy maple branch and trying to make her escape on foot after landing. But Alice saw where she'd land and was waiting and Jasper sent the fiery-headed female a flurry of devastating emotions. I saw them catalogued in his mind. Apathy, dread, sorrow, and a loss so deep and wide that seeing beyond it was too much for even a vampire's mind to manage.

Victoria cried out, wavering and was immediately pressed into the earth by Emmett's massive musculature. The rest of the family circled them, crouched low, rumbles loud in the night. Bella gripped my sleeve with one hand while her other smoothed her wind-and-fight ruffled hair.

"Did you want to say something to her before we tear her apart?" Emmett called.

"Yes!" My Bella, still gripping my shirtsleeve, crossed the space between us and my family. They were still on alert, but their stances relaxed somewhat. "What the hell, Victoria? Why me?"

"James!" the female spat, squirming under Emmett. "You had him killed."

"He bit me. He started my change! I didn't hurt him."

"No, that would have been me," Emmett told her, flicking her head with his finger. There was enough force that her face hit the dirt again.

"And me. And me!" Alice and Jasper said, their voices strangely light, all things considered.

Victoria kicked and Rosalie plopped on her feet. "Enough of that. Was James your mate?"

"Yes," Victoria whispered, her body stilling. "He was."

Esme grimaced and knelt near her head. "It's torture to be without him."

"Yes..."

"End it," Jasper directed. His mind was picturing an endless, lightless eternity without Alice and the despair he inadvertently shared with the rest of us was almost crippling.

"Don't have to tell me twice."

"But wait," Carlisle said, kneeling in the nomad's line of sight. "Victoria. It's been years and Bella wasn't responsible. Can you not let this vengeance go?"

The female whipped her head up, finding Jasper and glaring at him. "No. He's right. End it."

Emmett did. Almost dispassionately, he ripped Victoria's unresisting head from her body while Rosalie, after a glance at Bella, worked on the arms. Metallic tearing echoed in the forest and I winced, remembering that humans lived not far away.

"Let me," Bella murmured, hand outstretched. "Victoria, I'm sorry."

Carlisle looked away as the pieces of the malicious nomad were set aflame.

* * *

"I still have to go to work tonight," Bella said into the quiet of the evening. Purple smoke had dissipated to float on light summery currents of wind.

My family, who had lingered to see if any other surprises were coming out of the night, sighed as a group. "See you tomorrow, Bells?"

"Yeah, Emmett. And thank you. Thank you all so much." One by one, she approached each of them with a light embrace. Esme clutched her close, Jasper grinned over her head at me.

_Patience_, he reminded me. _Walk her home, little brother. _

I nodded at him as he released my Bella into Alice's embrace.

"See you soon! Have a good night at work." _And no hunting. Bella, I mean. Edward, you should hunt_. The family sent silent and vocal farewells and took off in pairs to return home. Fighting – for practice or for real – tended to lead to sex in our kind.

As if she had heard my psychic sibling, Bella smiled into my eyes. "You look thirsty, Edward."

"So do you," I said before I thought.

She rubbed a bit at her throat. "Yeah. Don't even need contacts, tonight."

"Let me walk you home?"

Her smile was shy. "Sure. Weren't we heading there?"

Before we were assaulted, yes. If she didn't want to reference it, I wouldn't either. "I do believe we were." _And we had been talking about us_, I wanted to add. I didn't.

She took my arm again, her steps slow. Reluctant, it seemed to me. "So are you okay? With the Demetri and Felix thing?"

Compared to the threat of a murderous rogue who had just tried to end my love's existence, the idea that Demetri had wanted to see if he were a mate to my Bella seemed very small. "Yeah, I guess I am."

"Good," she said, as if checking something off on her own private list. "Okay. Oh, look, almost there. Will you come in?"

It was our established pattern as we learned more about each other in this new life she had and the memories I could share with her. I followed her into her apartment and waited, trying to be patient as she paced between the living area and the kitchenette. Back and forth, occasionally sliding me a thoughtful look.

"What is it?" I finally asked.

"I – would you do me a favor?"

"Of course." She had to ask?

A sort of wary relief flared over her features. In a flash, she tossed me her cell phone. "Would you call my father? Would you call Charlie?"

I almost dropped the small cell phone in surprise. "What? Call Chief Swan?"

Her words came out in an audio-blur as she came to stand in front of me, clinging to the front of my shirt. "I want him to know I'm okay. I want him not to worry or be sad. I know I can't see him the way I look now but maybe we could do something with a webcam. I want him to be able to call me but I don't know if he wants to because I've been gone so long. Mostly, I want him to know I'm okay."

I wanted to ask Alice if this was the right thing to do, but when it came to Bella, Alice's gift was hit or miss. Mostly, miss. "Why me? Why don't you call him?"

I expected some big explanation – I never knew what she was thinking, but had to guess. More hit than miss, usually, but this time, I missed. Bella's brow furrowed. "I'm afraid."

"Why me?" I asked again, my voice more tender. I wanted to know. I had to know why she would choose _me_ to help her with this.

"Because I trust you, Edward. I told you – I remember... Almost everything. We only had a little bit of time, but I think I always trusted you."

I smiled a little, my free hand twitching to cup her face. "You did. You shouldn't have, but you did."

Her eyes glowed in the unlit room. The lack of artificial lighting mattered not at all for us; but still, she was shining for me. "I still do." With deliberate motions, she rolled up the sleeves of her shirt and, with a look, asked for her phone back. She tossed it on the plain brown "furnished apartment" piece of furniture that would have fit in anywhere. Then, she held up one hand.

"What?"

"Please, Edward. Let's find out, okay? I – I loved you, when I was human, you know."

My breath caught in my throat as I inhaled. "I know."

"When I got my memories back, that love was nestled in the middle of them. I – I feel like I was in love with you anyway. Just falling in love with you again over the summer."

My mouth opened and I desperately drew air into my lungs. "Oh, Bella. I love you. I never stopped."

"I love you, too. Please, Edward," she whispered. "Please touch me."

It was all I had wanted for months. For years. With one hand, I met the one she still held up for me. The other I allowed to trace her face. Finally. My chest tightened with emotion. My body trembled. My skin sizzled with the surety of the bond I knew we had between us. "Bella..."

"Edward... Oh..."

And then my hands were in her hair and hers were around me and we connected on every possible point. I had seen this need in the minds of Carlisle and Esme, of Rosalie and Emmett. I had seen the images and rambling, unconscious descriptions in their thoughts before I could tune them out. But none of that prepared me for the overwhelming connection I felt to Isabella Marie Swan in a darkened apartment in Freeport, Maine.

Lips slid over skin. I moaned, drew back, afraid I had overstepped but she pulled me back by my own hair, covering my mouth with hers and adding her sounds to mine. More. I needed more. She whispered that she did, too, and our clothes were soon obliterated. The taste of her skin, the heightened awareness of every part of her consumed me. Curves and peaks and indentations and dimples. Scars she had, scars I had given her. I caressed them with my tongue as she tasted me likewise.

How long we were lost in one another before I found myself poised over her supple, supine form I couldn't have said – my awareness was entirely with her. "Bella..."

"Please, Edward..." Her smile was rich with promise. "Whatever it is..."

"May I?"

"You're my mate. I'm yours. Take me. Show me."

I did.

* * *

My phone vibrated some while later. A half of a moon shone through the louvered blinds on the apartment windows. I would have ignored my phone but its intrusion reminded Bella of something rather significant and she sat up.

"I have to call in sick to work!"

I pulled her back down to me. "I am afraid I shan't be able to let you go for at least a week. Except to hunt." The mental images of Bella on the hunt aroused me again but then I remembered she was not yet hunting animals. I grimaced and tried to hide it.

Still, she pulled herself away and reached for my phone, which was in a torn pocket of my trousers. "A message from Alice."

_Called in sick. Pretended 2B Marie. U Owe Me. _

Bella and I shared a chuckle. Until her eye chanced upon her phone, still on the sofa. "Charlie."

"I'll call him."

* * *

_**May, 2015 - Brazil**_

"Yeah, Dad. I'll definitely come see you when we're done. Edward's found this really interesting treatment and – yeah. Love you, too."

She tossed the phone and rejoined me in our little house. It wasn't really sturdy – but we'd broken more than one wall of the Cullen's house, not to mention cracking the basement floor. Bella and I decided a honeymoon was in order. One in the midst of plentiful game that tasted better than mule deer.

My love's golden eyes twinkled at me. "I don't think we can put it off any more, sweetheart."

Nuzzling the slope of her shoulder, I sighed. "I know. You know Emmett is going to be jealous that you hunted jaguar."

Her laugh still brought me immeasurable joy. I could have sworn that, for just a moment, my dead heart gave a thump.

She had brought me back to life.

* * *

**E/N: And that's it!**

**This fic was a huge departure for me and I'll tell you why. You normally don't see any of my stories until I have outlined and plotted each step along the way. Granted, those steps might slide and glide occasionally, but I always know exactly how I'm ending it before I start posting.**

**With this one, I did not have a plan. My outline was the merest whiff of a whim. All I knew was that it would be an HEA for Edward and Bella. **

**So thank you for bearing with me. :) Thank you to everyone who read and added and reviewed and tweeted! :) It was kind of a wild ride for me! Thank you for your support. **

**~LJ**


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